Used To Be

"... I knew it’d be painful
but not hurt this much..."

I Thought For Sure

I thought for sure that I knew lonely,
from all those years I’d spent alone,
I thought I had a grasp on yearning...
that I'd forever drift and roam.

I thought for sure I’d dealt with sadness,
the crushing pain of emptiness,
was confident that I had seen it all...
until you shook that confidence.

I thought for sure my skin had aged with time,
thick enough to ward off pain,
that I had mastered my emotions...
would never crash so hard again.

I thought for sure I’d never walk this trail,
ever again - I must confess,
that years of wisdom would prevent me...
from ending up a rotten mess.

I thought for sure I’d handle casual,
‘til casual became a blaze,
I didn't know a fire burned in me...
which could consume my heart in days.

I thought for sure my nights of two were gone,
until you showed me true romance,
then all the dreams that you were truly mine...
were worn away by circumstance.

I thought for sure that I’d known heartache
from all the bad times I’d lived through,
but I guess I did not know what lonely was...
‘til I fell in love with you.

Copyright © 2016, 2017 Stone Bryson. All Rights Reserved.
Written April 2016; Edited April 2017

On The Line

"... why don't you just admit it -
you've got another on your mind..."

Unrequited

"...let it scar your throat -
and revel in the pain."

Easy For You

Drifting in and out of space,
I think about you every day...
is that not strange?
So many years have come and gone
since the last time that I saw...
your smile and grace.
I know I was not perfect...
and that I made mistakes,
but was I really, that easy… to replace?
Did I
make it easy for you...
to turn away from me,
to twist the good into the bad -
convert the memories?
I may have tripped and faltered...
been less than what you dreamed,
I guess I made it easy for you...
but it’s not easy for me.

Rains that fall and snowdrifts peak,
all the things we fought to keep...
they won’t release.
So many years have passed us by
yet still I can’t push from my mind...
the memories.
I know I missed the target…
and that I lost my way,
but was I really, that easy… to erase?
Did I
make it easy for you...
to drive me from your heart,
to use my stumbled missteps -
wedge us further apart.
I never meant to hurt you, baby…
but that’s an ignored plea,
it seems I made it easy for you...
but not easy......
for me.

Copyright © 2009 Stone Bryson. All Rights Reserved.
Written October 2009

Anymore

You brew your morning coffee
while I scan the TV space,
my commentary is just enough -
contempt across your face,
the dream you had of where we’d be
got lost in daily grind,
you feel the pressure of the future…
the things that tie and bind.

These last few years are wearing you -
I can see it in your eyes,
my little quirks you once found cute -
you cannot exorcise,
the day-to-day of living with me has
become a draining chore,
I have no doubt you love me…
but I don’t think you like me
anymore.

Your impatience is so prevalent
with every breath and sigh,
I feel it when you cut me off -
you know you can’t deny,
you work so hard to hide the truth
but it’s time to call your bluff
for I know you know that even love...
sometimes ain’t enough.

I feel the struggle of mind and heart -
you do not want to leave,
but my habits drive you to the edge -
feeling so naïve,
I sense you’re getting tired and don’t know
what you’re staying for,
I have no doubt you love me…
but I don’t think you like me
anymore.

Original Copyright © 2006 Stone Bryson. All Rights Reserved.
Included in the e-book, "Walls of Shadow"
Written November 2006